Ember G Writes

Hi how are you? I know this blog is late sorry! This one is going to be my real, current thoughts… just a heads up, feel free to skip this one.

I am honestly not to sure what to write for this blog post. I guess there are a lot of things I am currently feeling, I am probably going to be brutally honest throughout this blog.

Among the many things I am feeling currently, I am feeling a bit betrayed really. It might be a bit dramatic, but I genuinely can’t think of another word that justifies all I am feeling. I am frustrated, angry, sad, upset, hurt and disappointed. It’s pretty overwhelming…

Why do people go back on their words? Why give someone a sense of security, only to pull it away in a matter of days?

My situation is not something I want to put out here. It is not a relationship gone wrong before you jump to that conclusion, even though it might sound like that! I’m just so tired of being in these situations, I cried a few times today in all honesty.

I cried in the office of someone I work with, I cried walking to the shop to get my lunch, I cried down the phone to my mum and cried to a friend today. I don’t know if its because I’m so, so close to the end of this gap year program, and all the exhaustion is catching up with me. Maybe I am being more sensitive because of that?

This is the second door that has closed for me in the past couple of weeks, I have been praying since the start of this new term, that God would show me the right way, the right thing to do next. It would seem that things are pointing to going back to my home city.

I am not sure how I feel about that one. I feel like I don’t have a place back home, even where I currently am, I don’t feel like I have a place. I guess I have felt a lot like I was passing through, like where I am living currently, I always knew it was only temporary.

Its funny how some people will make exceptions for one person and not the other. I guess I had a feeling at the very beginning, its a shame that it had to be proved right.

Certain life situations are unfortunately, never fair. No matter how much you do, how gracious you are, how much you serve, how patient you are, how kind you are… some people just take and expect you to keep on giving, even when you have nothing left to give.

You would hope for compassion but unless money is involved, well I guess compassion is swept under the rug. That is, until money arrives in the back pocket of people.

I guess I’m just saying, be good people. Be kind and compassionate. Don’t leave someone behind, don’t forget that, the people around you, are also fellow human beings.

Treat people how you wish to be treated. Don’t take advantage of them and then drop them when they have nothing left to give. Be reasonable and understanding.

Don’t give somebody false hope, a false sense of security, only to go back on your word. Especially when they need you the most…

Stay safe, stay kind. Thankyou for reading – Em

INSTAGRAM: embergwrites